Winner: UK Family Entertainer 2018


Welcome To The Nut House!

Hi Guys, Nutty Noah here. Thanks for clicking onto my website, I’ve clocked up a few miles performing over the years and have been lucky enough to pick up a couple of awards along the way too.


I try my very best to provide you with a truly pants entertainment experience, It’s great, everybody says so.

Wear Your Pants With Pride

You can wear them on your head


And cuddle them in bed…

Wear Your Pants With Pride

Put them on your bum and wash them when you’re done

Wear Your Pants With Pride

You know you’re going to hurt me, if you tell me that they’re dirty…

Wear Your Pants With Pride

Wear them if they’re pink, but try not to if they shrink…

Wear Your Pants With Pride

You can throw them on the floor and hang them from the door

Wear Your Pants With Pride

If you have a pair you love in every single way, you can turn them inside out and wear them for an extra day

Wear Your Pants With Pride

If you’ve nothing else to do, you can fill them up with……..

Stay Safe and Keep Well

Hey guys, hope you are all keeping well and staying safe. I wrote a sing about how it's been here and thought you might like to see and hear it. Love you all!

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Christmas Crazy Crackers!

Who doesn't love it when it snows at Christmas but it hardly ever does, until now.... Happy Christmas you filthy animals!  

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Give us those Beans!

You know how annoying and repetitive Baby Shark was? Well hang your hat on this Cornhole Trumpet of a song. All of the music is made up of Mud Flapping-Airborne Cracking-Carpet Rattling sound effects (and the singing isn't much better). The video was the Bean child of...

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“The King of all things silly”

Ben Elton
(Not the one with glasses who plays the piano… that’s Elton John)
(also not the other one that plays the piano, that’s Ben Folds)
(…and also not the one with the supermarket… that’s Eltham)

“Brilliant and Inventive”

Lucy Porter – Awesome comedian
(Not Lucy Pearman, she’s awesome too)
(also not Linda Porter, she was the slot machine addict in Twin Peaks)
(…and also not Lucy Edwards, she’s family and my friend on Facebook)

Silly Songs for Kids

‘Very funny songs. If you have children, but especially boys aged 5-9 they will LOVE this album, (although I’m 36 and i still enjoy it) – Animals Poo is a classic’.

Nutty Noah's Big Number Two

‘This man is just sublimely funny, his lyrics hilarious and his show,well…BEYOND FUNNY. Happy song has to be one of THE greatest feel good songs ever and Wear your pants with pride one of the silliest. Pure genius’.

Nutty Noah's Third Adventure

‘Buy this album if you love funny songs, buy this album if you love Noah and to paraphrase the great man himself …If you or anyone you know don’t buy this for yourself or someone else – you don’t love them! Comedy genius (Again)’.

You Might Die

‘Nutty Noah is to kids music what Roald Dahl is to kids books, quite simply a genius! This is his fourth album with more fabulousness’.

Stuff You Can Buy

Nutty Noah Tee Shirts

Kids, Mens and Ladies Short Sleeved T-Shirt.

Short Sleeved 100% cotton t-shirt – 180gm weight. From £10

Baseball Cap

Kids and Adults Baseball Cap

100% Cotton Twill. Rip-Strip size adjuster. Child safe secure button
from £5.00

Ladies 'Special' Bag

Ladies ‘Cycle’ Bag, Printed with inspirational text, great quality and perfect for Mum’s Sticky Cotton Wool!


Ripper Wallets

Ripper Wallets

Expandable coin pocket – Clear identification window £5.00

Boys & Girls Pants

Boys and Girls Pants

Worn on your head of course! Various colours, £3.50

Adult Pants

Adult Pants


Video Of The Moment

Keep coming back for more special videos… there will be a new one soon!!

Nutty Noah - Family Entertainer
Nutty Noah - Family Entertainer19 hours ago
I know it’s not yet December but the adverts don’t seem to care, so may I present to you a Christmas song by me and a couple of friends thanks to all those lovely people who sent me pics for the video. Happy Christmas and Let It Snow!
Nutty Noah - Family Entertainer
Nutty Noah - Family Entertainer4 days ago
I love my mate Tom, when he asked for a jingle for his bike business, I couldn’t refuse!!
Nutty Noah - Family Entertainer
Nutty Noah - Family Entertainer7 days ago
Evening you gorgeous NutCrackers! I’ve written a Christmas song and I want to do a video for it but I won’t have time to finish it properly this Yuletide. So, as a holding video for this year it’d be fab if you could send some pics of you enjoying Christmas, so I could create a slideshow type of thingy? Whadddayathunky??
Nutty Noah - Family Entertainer
Nutty Noah - Family Entertainer is at Center Parcs Longleat Forest.3 weeks ago
Center Parcs Longleat Forest
A very rare sighting of an entertainer at work in the wild, please donate to keep this endangered species from becoming extinct!! For an eye watering one off fee, you too could have a card trick rammed down your throat while you're trying to eat a burger of extraordinary quality!

Thanks to Tony for permission to use the photo, hope you and the family had a great stay!
Nutty Noah - Family Entertainer
Nutty Noah - Family Entertainer4 weeks ago
Whoop whoop a return to some kind of normality! But for how long????
Nutty Noah - Family Entertainer
Nutty Noah - Family Entertainer2 months ago
I didn’t realise that soundcloud may have been a pain in the bum for some of you so I’ve uploaded the song to YouTube for you all to enjoy! 🎃😈
Nutty Noah - Family Entertainer
Horrible Halloween
A spooky Halloween song for all you lovers of spooky Halloween songs! Words - Dov Citron Music - Noah Kelly

This Week’s Numbers

Laughs Had

Tears (Sad)

Lollies Licked

Bogeys Picked

A Great Nutty Bake Off

(Make me a cake and I’ll show it to the world!)